LOVE.

♥ 21

Monday, October 8, 2007

8:40 PM

i wonder why polyclinics have never given me non-drowsy medicine before.
it seems like they never do.
i guess it's just a plot or a strategy they adopt to make their patients get rest.
cos some really stuborn ppl usually dont heed the doctor's advice of getting 'more rest'.
thus perhaps they have to resort to such means to 'force' patients to rest.
haha. perhaps. my own hypothesis.

im now in a dilemma.
i wanna go vj, take tsd, join judo/taekwondo + cheerleading.
at the same time i like tj too. their mass dance, ccas...
argh. im just wondering if my prelim results are good enough to get me into vj for PAE.
i'll be really disappointed if i dont, but i can always go tj.
i like tj EQUALLY. so tj is not a place for vj rejects.
it was once my first choice,so i dont consider that place as a dumping area for vj rejects. (:
vj jumped back to my first choice probably because a couple of reasons, like they offer tsd, jap and also there's a direct bus there from my house.
it's like so much more convenient.
so yeah, i think i'll put victoria junior college as my first choice on that PAE form im getting on 16nov.

vj open house was cool.
the tsd performance was great. i liked the lecturers. they're fun.
the costume designing thing totally aroused my interest in tsd.
although i cant draw, but i think designing costumes for like say, lady macbeth, would be pretty fun and interesting.
im sorry i missed the dance performance.
wanted to see it, but it's better not to make you guys wait for me, doing something perhaps you wouldnt enjoy.
and you've already waited for me for like, 50mins? so i guess i shouldnt be so mean to make you wait all the time.
im really sorry i was late.
actually, your expression when i first saw you that day was scary.
i didnt know what's bothering you, cos it seems like i havent talked to you properly for a long long time.
sorry, i didnt ask.
i was afraid i'd be too kaypoh.

tmr and the day after and the day after tmr is all about grad ceremony.
hur.
like uma and yanhui and probably alot more others, i dont feel like graduating.
leaving cedar is quite a horrible thought.
what if i land somewhere without anyone with me?
i'm really afraid to be alone.
i dont want to be by myself.
what if my new companions didnt like me?
im afraid of all these thoughts.
im afraid they'll come true.
besides, i had lynette and arica's company on the first day of my cedar life.
so it wasnt that bad.
aye, i think im just too dependant.
someone please help me get rid of this bad habit.

ooh. what nice timing.
anie smsed me to ask about my last day in cedar.
hur. how ironic.

havent been doing much lately, really.
been slacking off like shit.
crap i need help.
i need someone or something to help me get focused. darn it.
been spending alot of time on the computer and tv.
i dont know, something within me is telling me to leave all studying for another day.
but i know that's just going to make things worse.
14 days to o'level amath paper.
i dont wish to think how it'd turn out like.
not like my prelims, i hope.
i want an a1, not a2.
what's the good of an a2 when i know myself i can get a1?
sheesh. gotta work harder.

we are rowing in a boat of Fate.
the waves keep on coming and we cant escape.
but if we ever get lost on our way,
the waves will guide you through another day.